Synopsis: A marketing expert (Ann Magnuson) is hired by a tech company to show their new android (John Malkovich) to the world. John Malkovich also plays the introverted scientist who created the android, so they look EXACTLY ALIKE! Ooooooooo. 80’s rom com, sci-fi mish mash.
Directed by Susan Seidelman
Screenplay by Floyd Byars, Laurie Frank
Stars: John Malkovich, Ann Magnuson, Glenne Headly, Ben Masters, Laurie Metcalf (Some of these people are actually famous, I swear, look them up)
This movie, in all its glory, is a true stink-a-roo. It is an 80’s comedy, almost to the extreme. All it needed was nudity. I mean, it had nudity, but it was John Malkovich’s ass, which he either shaved for the part, for it comes naturally hairless. Now days you can just paint an ass green and remove the hair later with a computer. Ah, technology. I imagine women’s groups would be up in arms about this movie today, because although the main woman has a high ranking position in the marketing world, she is also a stereotype. She drives badly; there is a scene where she is putting on her makeup at a stop light, and of course she holds up traffic doing that. She is constantly thinking about her relationship, or consoling her sister who is being cheated on, or getting ready for her other sister’s wedding, or listening to her mother talk about how she needs to get back with her ex because she’ll never do better. Ugh, pure garbage.
I don’t want you to watch this picture, let me get that out of the bag here. It’s bad, don’t do it. It’s full of 80’s fashion, 80’s keyboard, and there is a really bad song in the beginning of the movie. Something about “too many fish in the sea”. I could go into the story, but do I really need to? I do? You bastards.
So Frankie Stone (Ann Magnuson) goes to the lab, and meets Dr. Peters (John Malkovich) who is an ass. Then she ends up hanging out with the android, who is named Ulysses, because, you know, that’s a great name. Frankie proceeds to try to teach Ulysses to be a person, and makes him feel things, and naturally the android falls for her. There is a scene at the mall where wacky stuff happens, and a scene where he puts a diaphragm in his mouth (because he doesn’t know its not gum!), and other stuff happens. It’s not a good movie, did I already say that? It has a happy ending, la de FREAKING da!
Oh, did I mention the android gets laid? Yeah.
John Malkovich in Making Mr. Right:
Now, despite everything I said about how bad this movie is, and how I’d advise you to watch a documentary on the mating rituals of hillbillies before watching Making Mr. Right, John Malkovich does a great job. He has 2 parts, and the characters are effectively varied. His scientist was easily agitated, egotistical, a gigantic nerd. His android was innocent, affectionate, pants-less for several scenes. Malkovich did a really good job, sometimes playing the characters as they talked to each other. He separated them, made the real individuals. Basically, despite the movie’s plot, I was very happy watching him do this part. I got a sense that he can actually play different parts. So, why is it that I never see him doing that (at least now days)? At some point directors just wanted John Malkovich to play John Malkovich. And I suppose he is happy playing himself, otherwise he wouldn’t do it so often. Malkovich is the only redeeming thing about Making Mr. Right, but I cannot imagine that this movie was good for his career.
The next movie I am going to watch is Dangerous Liaisons. WHOA WHOA WHOA, wait a minute you say! According to IMDB he had quite a few movies in between Making Mr. Right and Dangerous Liaisons! Yes, I am aware of that. Unfortunately, Netflix is not. My first choice was The Glass Menagerie, which I assume is based on the Tennessee Williams play. Netflix on the other hand, seems to have never heard of the movie at all, so that’s a no go. My next option was Empire of the Sun. I added it to my queue, looked around at some other stuff on my list, and noticed that the wait time for Empire was “very soon”. Now, having had other “very soon” items on my list before, I knew that “very soon” can mean 10 years from now. So, I said screw it. Next on the list Miles from Home, the never released on DVD Miles from Home. What the hell!! That left me with Oscar award winning Dangerous Liaisons. So sad for me, I know. I still have Empire of the Sun in my queue, and if it comes up I will watch it for sure. Until then, I hope you will all join me next week. Any question, comments, or pictures of your relatives you want to send me, please send them to JDTMovies@gmail.com.
P.S. Please don’t send me any pictures of your relatives.
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